Monday, March 26, 2012

Thoughts after our first month





It's really hard to decide how much I should share publicly. There are parts of our children's story that I want to remain private, as it is not my story to tell "the world". Most of what I know is either second hand information or painful details my son has shared with me. But it is safe to say that children do not end up in an orphanage and adopted internationally out of happy circumstances. There is profound loss, sadness, family crisis and even death that is all weaved into a few short years in a child's life. A childhood that is abruptly interrupted by adult responsibilities of caring for younger siblings, begging and working without access to education or normal child activities. There are also memories of a happier time even though that may have included extreme poverty. It can be such a mixed bag of memories and emotions. Either way, coming to a new family is so unfamiliar and overwhelming.

I thank God that He lead us to adopting siblings and specifically "older children". We are going through such healing together and they are able to verbalized so much of it. There are tough moments of grieving, but there are so many more of pure joy and sharing many "firsts". To see their pure amazement of a drive thru "restaurant" or using an ATM (money comes out of a wall?) or visiting a zoo (even though Kofi wanted to jump in with the lions...) are precious memories that I am able to witness as their Mommy. Kofi and I spent at least 30 minutes discussing how a vacuum cleaner works and he thought it was the most amazing invention. Every time I see them run to me when they are hurt, I am reminded of a time they just whimpered quietly because no one had kissed they boo boos in a long time. This weekend, I worked a 4 hour shift while Eric was with the children. Once I came home and opened the door, Kofi ran to me and hugged me so tightly and said "Mommy is home. I love you Mommy!". God is making us a family and healing hearts.

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