Thursday, March 29, 2012
In the past 6 weeks home, a transformation has been taking place. As we build trust, we speak new truths into our children's hearts. This change is evident in both children, but in some ways I see it more in our daughter. At age 3, she has had a childhood full of changes and sad circumstances. She certainly wasn't asked if she wanted an obruni Mommy and if she wanted to fly across the world to live in a strange place. By nature she is shy and reserved (for about 5 minutes) until she is comfortable with her surroundings. In some ways she is a typical toddler with testing boundaries, tantrums and her own preferences. She is a girly girl who loves sunglasses, hair bows, nail polish and Dora the Explorer. In other ways, she carries behaviors and memories from her past that are sad to see. But all in all, in the past month and a half, she has made such great strides to become a daughter again. She is amazing.
The above picture is from the first moment we met our children last May. They were accompanied by a sweet girl on the right. I can just see the sheer confusion and fright in her body language. I wanted to scoop her up and just love on her, but I knew she needed a little time. In my heart, I was her Mommy already, but in her mind I was a stranger.
It didn't take long though and she was playing, tickling us, bossing us around;) and comfortable with us. We had the most amazing week together and our goodbyes were sad.
Although she knew us when she joined our family on Valentine's Day, there were moments that I saw the familiar body language of confusion and being scared reappear. She would climb on my back and that provided the familiarity she craved at the moment.
Now those moment are less frequent. She is a happy girl who is embracing her new world. Physically, she is looking healthier. Emotionally, she is more balanced. The empty look in her eyes is being replaced by life and sparkle. In some aspects we have come so far already. This is not to say that we don't have issues or that I am painting a rosy picture of our life. I just want to celebrate the success that we are experiencing right now.
Sweet Joy Agyeiwaa, I am so proud of you.
Posted by Jenni at 9:57 AM
Monday, March 26, 2012
It's really hard to decide how much I should share publicly. There are parts of our children's story that I want to remain private, as it is not my story to tell "the world". Most of what I know is either second hand information or painful details my son has shared with me. But it is safe to say that children do not end up in an orphanage and adopted internationally out of happy circumstances. There is profound loss, sadness, family crisis and even death that is all weaved into a few short years in a child's life. A childhood that is abruptly interrupted by adult responsibilities of caring for younger siblings, begging and working without access to education or normal child activities. There are also memories of a happier time even though that may have included extreme poverty. It can be such a mixed bag of memories and emotions. Either way, coming to a new family is so unfamiliar and overwhelming.
Posted by Jenni at 3:38 PM